Playboy Finally Dropped Sex Toys—but Are They Any Good?

We might not have a great train system or pink cocaine yet here in America, but you know what we do have? Lots of sex toys. I’ve tried some bangers for VICE, from rabbits that give you biofeedback on your orgasms to a #verymetal vibrating steel dildo. We’re in an aesthetic toy renaissance, and it’s led by sexual wellness brands that want to purge our lives of cheapo PVC cum rods, and fill our [redacted] with beautiful, body-safe sex toys backed by celebs with bougie Architectural Digest home tours; think, Dame, Unbound Babes, Maude—even Diesel collaborated with the luxury Swedish sex toy brand LELO on a batch of vibrators. 

Now, Playboy is throwing its hat into the C-ring. When the horny empire announced it would be dipping its bunny tail into sex toy creation with Lovers, I was 1) stoked and 2) curious about whether or not its vibes could hold their own in an increasingly saturated masturbation market; there’s a legion of over 58,500 Amazon reviewers for the Satisfyer Pro 2 alone, jabroni. But I digress.

Playboy has more historical sex cachet than anyone else in the game. When you’ve been steadily edging the public for 70 years, the people are going to expect some powerful players, and the line of toys—known as Playboy Pleasure—includes a broad range of both introductory staples and flex items, from lubes and a classic wand vibrator to a “three-way cock ring” that looks like it speaks several languages. 

I charged up five of the line’s stand-out toys for a test run, from headbanging anal toys to a rabbit vibe that deserves its own kaiju movie, and wrote down my honest notes on what rocked, what didn’t, and what was truly game-changing.

Let’s meet the gang. 

The packaging for all of the Playboy toys is just *chef’s kiss* chic. They all come in a slick white box with the brand logo, and include clear instructions for storage, cleaning, and use—although, nothing prepared me for the power of this monster jam rumbler, which is almost 11 inches long and has not one but three vibrating components that harmonize together to stimulate your clit and G-spot like a rumbling, roaring Rube Goldberg machine. Big main character energy.   

At first, I thought the “Spinning Tail Teaser” earned its name from the soft serve swirl texture of its plug, but this vibrating backdoor buddy will also bend and roll its head around like Sia in your anus, making sure you have a well-rounded sensory experience. At three insertable inches, it’s the kind of butt plug you can grow with; start out slow and gradually work your way up its seven vibrations and rhythms.

Lovers is also the guardian of one of the best rose clitoral vibrators, so it comes as no surprise that it chose to innovate the TikTok viral vibrator with Playboy by giving the horny flower a handy stem/handle and long, direct clitoral contact “tongue.” The fluttering nub at the heart of the rose will not quit on your clit (or perineum, if that’s your vibe), and feels like you’re getting really good head from a lover (if your lover’s tongue had nine speeds and vibration patterns). 

I was VERY intrigued by this garlic clove clitoral palm vibrator, and it gets high marks for 1) how easy it is to hold and 2) how Chef’s Table-core it is in design. That being said, the little nub at the center of its hole (which goes on your hole/clit) was a little too small for my taste; the effect was less like the slutty tongue-lapping of the Petal vibe, and more like someone poking you in line at Target. Feels great on your nips, though! 

Krakatoa lives on in this thrusting rabbit vibrator, whose shaft has the ribbed texture of a Pringles snake prank, and whose clitoral attachment is equipped with two wide-set, jutting bunny ears to slide up and down your clit for extra stimulation. It’s a rumbler, which I dig, and it closed the case for me on what Playboy was going for with its sex toy drop as a whole: powerful toys with a whole lot of bells and whistles. 

Playboy and Lovers’ first sex toy drop gave us versatile vibes with major horsepower. If you love a rumbly vibrator, reach for the line’s textured thrusters and dildos; if you want a toy dedicated to direct clitoral stimulation, you’ll have your pick of toys that will give you broader and more targeted stimulation. It’s hard to set yourself apart amongst all the posh sex toy brands these days, but the overwhelming themes of the line were definitely 1) POWER, and 2) multi-tasking abilities, and it’s fair to say that Playboy has reminded everyone that it’s the GOAT of getting it on. 

Shop the Playboy sex toy line at Lovers.

The Rec Room staff independently selected all of the stuff featured in this story. Want more reviews, recommendations, and red-hot deals? Sign up for our newsletter.