Here's How to Style Big-Ass Basketball Shorts This Summer

Hold onto your Oakleys and crank up the Prodigy, because it’s a big, breezy basketball short summer. Not that we’ve ever been lacking in B-ball abundance, but our street scouts have recently clocked an influx of inspired B-ball short stylings from coast to coast. We’ve seen folks—OK, Bella Hadid—in NYC style them with equestrian boots in an irreverent play on proportion and function; we’ve watched LA peeps contrast their masc mesh knee-grazers with a femme heel like Rihanna to turn heads, and seen Adam Sandler slay in oversized blue B-ballers. Now that it’s summer and the need for long, leg-caging pants is lifted, we’re revisiting our love for big-ass basketball shorts and how to style them for weddings, Berghain, and a jaunt to the bodega. 

Are we reinventing the wheel with this declaration of B-ball love? No, of course not. We’re just paying our respects [dabs at Michael Jordan shrine] and making sure you secure some comfy ‘fits that will earn you club clout, and maybe even a peck on the cheek. We’re equally big fans of short shorts on bros in a 1979 Jim Kelly type of way, but today we’re paddle boarding down to the other, spacious end of the spectrum to 1) debunk the elitist myth that B-ball shorts can’t be high fashion, and 2) bring a truly versatile piece into your warm weather capsule wardrobe. 

There are no real rules for styling basketball shorts (unless you’re in the NBA, obviously) but we can help you hone in on some artistic directions. Styling B-ball shorts is a study in contrasts. Remember: the bigger the bottom, the tinier the top. That being said, I also love pulling up to the gas station in my long boi shorts, Adidas slides, and an XXL Deadhead T-shirt; I want my shorts to be big, and then bigger; I want microclimates in my jumbo wumbos, or the ability to use the shorts’ pockets as a secret built-in wallet. 

Bros: Have you been wanting to soft-launch yourself into styling kilts and skirts? Long basketball shorts are a solid first foray into knee-grazing territory. Are you sick to death of structured chinos? Let the liquid feel of B-ball shorts make it all better. Often, I pair my shiny mesh swishers with long white toe socks and black Tevas for a Junya Watanabe vibe, or a pair of tall red boots, an unfiltered cigarette, and a Jil Sander blazer for some “Step on me, Maman” energy. The possibilities are endless, mon petit chou. 

Whether your love of basketball shorts was born from gabbing under bridges, watching Space Jam, or making your Homies toys kiss during recess, we ride for you—so let’s dive into the many, many stylings of our favorite summer style essential. 

If you don’t know where to begin, start off with a pair of classique Nike basketball shorts. This pair has a 4.6-star average rating on Amazon, and is light as a feather according to reviewers. As one fan writes, “This is now my lightest pair of Nike shorts. It kinda feels like you’re not wearing shorts.” It comes in 12 colorways, but we vibe with the bright red, which would look great with no shirt, no shoes, and just this green Aries balaclava.

Never have I ever felt more connected to my ancestors than when I crack a purple borscht tongue smile and a Slavic squat in some Kappa basketball shorts and a Kappa top. I can practically hear the gabber cousins in Vrhnika giggle and kick their feet. 

These Obituary basketball shorts are a VICE editor-favorite, and would look really excellent/Julia Fox-ready with a comfy halter-style denim bra from Los Angeles Apparel for a ‘fit that says, “My assistant just signed me up for Zoom-based ketamine therapy.”  

Is it time already to pitch that pyramid scheme investment plan at your stepsister’s wedding? Pull up to the family function in these luxuriating, über comfy mesh shorts by Champion—which have over 40K Amazon ratings and feel like liquid silk on my thighs, TBH—and pair them with a white tank top, a gold chain, Cole Haan penny loafers, and an oversized black blazer. We found a super affordable Amazon option for the latter, but we’re also into the boxy Tony Soprano build of this Samsøe Samsøe blazer that is 52% off at SSENSE. 

Bring a little swoon to the swish of your B-ball shorts by finding a pair with a romantic, almost cottagecore fabric choice. This aubergine, patterned pair by Needles will make everyone think you still remember the ins-and-outs of iambic pentameter. Pair it with a tactical green fishing vest that says, “My other car is a kayak.” 

It’s almost that time of the year again, m’lords. Bump Andre Nickitina’s Dice of Life, dust off your gauntlets, and get dressed to pull wenches at the Renaissance faire. Find us at the Ye Olde Fajitas stand in a chainmail top, rocking either these dazzling vintage silver Nike basketball shorts, or this high-rated, quick-drying pair from Amazon that looks like the belly of a pissed-off dragon.  

Pay your respects to longstanding McDonald’s figurehead, newly queer icon, and apparent throat GOAT Grimace with these purple B-ball shorts. They barely cost more than a Happy Meal.    

May you forever ball, my brother in Christ. 

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