Where Do We Get Off? Saving 80% Off Sex Toys During Masturbation May

When it comes to non-bank holidays, Masturbation May takes the cake, ices it in lube, and gives it a brand new enema. We’ll always have hard wood for Arbor Day, but we’re stoked that the sex toy powers that be have deemed May the best month for getting up to 80% off luxury dildos, sex toys for couples, and beginner’s BDSM gear online. 

Spring is for cleaning, avoiding taxes, un-cuffing from winter situationships, and treating yourself to a gadget that makes you think, “Wow, I never knew my P-spot could sing like Andrea Bocelli.” We’re always here for you—right under your bed!—with sex toy advice for all of your needs and horny holes, but this month’s slew of sales has awoken something extra special in our hearts, and in our pants; there’s simply nothing sweeter than blowing your load (and not your wallet) on really great sex toys. 

We’ve greased up our lasso like Tom of Finland, and wrangled the best Masturbation May sex toy deals from LELO, Lovehoney, Babeland, and more sexual wellness sites that give us toe-curling, milk-churning orgasms.     

Once you have added Maldon salt and Calvin Klein boxers to your Amazon cart, peep some of the behemoth retailer’s many sex toy sales. You can save 20% off this discreet and travel-friendly bullet vibrator for clitoral and erogenous zone play, or cop this thrusting anal vibrator-cock-ring hybrid sex toy for 21% off. As one fan of the latter writes, “I exploded in minutes.” What more could you want?   

Masturbation May is in full swing at Babeland, where you can get $25 off orders of $125+ with the code HANDY. Find us riding the inimitable Snail Vibe vibrator into the sunset, because it is 1) that big and 2) that powerful; I personally tested all the bells and whistles of this vibrator in this VICE review, and was impressed by how deftly it slug-trailed its way into my heart. I’ve never used a dildo-style toy that gives such a unique sensation of fullness and simultaneous clitoral stimulation. 

Did you know that “Fernando” was inspired by the luxury Swedish sex toy brand LELO? The brand is a purveyor of some of the world’s most elegant, throne-worthy vibrators, and it’s offering up to 50% off select items during its Masturbation Month sale. The Enigma Cruise is $55 off, and a VICE-editor favorite for its ability to stimulate both your G-spot and clitoris like a gifted sexual partner. As Angel Kilmister writes in her VICE review of the toy, “You know when you're receiving oral and your partner slides in a couple of fingers at the optimal time? This is the best toy for replicating that crazy-hot combo.”   

… Then there’s the Sona 2 Cruise, which is $30 off and a legend in its own right in the category of compact clitoral vibrators. The Sona can fit in the palm of your hand, making it a great toy to toss in your carry-on, and, to quote LELO, it uses “sonic pulses that resonate deep into the internal structure of the clitoris for an entirely new sensation.” Think of it as having a clitoral orgasm in 4KHD.    

Ah, Lovehoney. How we love you and your vast smorgasbord of sex toys, crotchless panties, and bondage gear. We love you so much that we wrote you a sonnet/VICE guide to the very best toys to cop from your tool belt, and many of them are up to 40% off right now for spring with the code LH40. Play ring toss with the site’s bestselling cock ring, which includes textured nubs for heightened clitoral stimulation, and bring home Blowmotion’s GOAT-ed penis stroker, which, according to reviewers, is a breeze to clean and “Blows an old school Fleshlight out of the water!” 

Listen, I’m coming off of a personal love-high with MysteryVibe. I reviewed the brand’s Crescendo 2 vibrator for VICE this week, and was so impressed by how the G-spot and clitoral vibe can change shape internally while you hump and grind against it, and that’s just the beginning of what this hot rod can do; I can’t wait to bring it into prostate play with partners. Smash that order button on the versatile toy while it’s $50 off for the brand’s spring sale.  

We’ve saved the meatiest of sex toy sales for last, champion. You can save up to 80% off clearance items and 30% off everything else at PinkCherry with the code MAY. In layman’s terms: There has never been a better moment to bring home one of those TikTok-viral clitoral rose vibrators for almost $25 off. I tested one for VICE recently, and was impressed by how easy it was to hold and maneuver around my clit like a horny Poké Ball. 

Happy spring, you horny toads.  

The Rec Room staff independently selected all of the stuff featured in this story. Want more reviews, recommendations, and red-hot deals? Sign up for our newsletter.