'I Decided to Cancel My Trip to Tehran to Visit My Family [out of] Fear'

This interview is part of Broadly's Voices Against the Ban series. You can read more of these voices here.

Broadly: Where are you from and when did you come to the US?

Mani, Tehran/NYC: I was born and raised in Iran. I moved here in 2010 when I was 23 to pursue an MFA Degree. I ended up at Parsons and I graduated in 2013. I've been working in media, design, and technology ever since.

Why did you feel compelled to share your story with us?

I think it's important to reflect the stories of those affected by certain policies. When someone has hegemony over storytelling and has tools and the power to tell stories it becomes important to tell the stories that are not necessarily heard from an official standpoint. If my story becomes a case and point to further describe the dilemma that this country is facing then I'm more than happy to share whatever I can.

Why did you decide to come to the US?

I was not the first person in my family to consider continuing their education in the US. My oldest sister set the example when she moved here in '99 to pursue her degree in engineering. It was sort of like the paved path in my family. It was expected that at some point I would graduate from undergrad and find the environment that would allow me to study and do what I wanted to do. The reason I chose the States was because of how inclusive it is. It has immigration and diversity included in the fabric of its society. You really don't see the same thing in Europe regardless of how urban or populated a city might be. When you live in a country made up of foreigners and immigrants, the chances of you not being accepted within that society is lower. We saw that as an opportunity to get an education and blend in and build a life for ourselves.

I still feel that way, but it doesn't come from the powers that be. It comes from seeing how people have raised their voices and how people who were not necessarily directly affected by those bans came to support people who were; my neighbors, my Puerto Rican, Dominican, Panamanian neighbors make me feel like I'm very much welcome. But from the official standpoint, I very much feel rejected.

Were you surprised by these orders?

If you're from Iran or a number of different countries, this rhetoric is nothing new. The extent to which it's being exercised and put forth as a draconian set of policies, however, is. What I mean by this is nothing new: I was always on a single entry visa, meaning when I came here I couldn't go back on breaks to see my family. I could see that my international student friends could very easily do that. Under Obama, this was overturned and multiple entry visas were given to students, given they weren't researching things like nuclear physics. I was just an art student so I was granted a multi-entry visa and that was great. I used it once, however when I transferred to a work visa it was the same problem. You can't leave. If you leave you essentially jeopardize your life situation because who's to say you're not going to be held in some buffer third country because your FBI check is taking a long time. I'm not just speculating; this is something that would happen very often. I dealt with it and realized it was a limitation I'd have to find a work-around for. Under the new administration you feel like everything you've been working towards all of a sudden doesn't mean anything.

How does this affect you personally?

I was recently granted a piece of paper with a funny name, Advanced Parole, which meant I could go visit family. I was planning to visit in April of this year and take an entire month to see family and scheduled everything around that month, and everything is now up in the air. I decided to cancel my trip to Tehran to visit my family because of the fear that I might lose my status here in this country.

There are people far worse affected by this. It's taking a toll on me and my family: my parents as green card holders, my sister who, despite the fact that she has a French passport, still had to apply for a visa to come here for a family reunion because she's from Iran, and was still held at the airport for questioning, asked for her social media, and her brother's address. A lot of these measures are put in place as a means of intimidation: the overarching idea of "we are onto you, we see you. You don't have the privilege to enter this country as you want because you are a special case and you will be treated as such."

This interview has been edited and condensed.