No One Says 'Easy D' Unless They're Referring to a Dick, Brooklynites Confirm

Again the bridge troll poses his riddle; as always, it is completely inscrutable. What is this simple and straightforward "D?" the internet wondered. D-cision? the Guardian posed politely. A nickname? some Twitter users suggested. The vast majority of the internet, however, was far less generous. Dick, everyone joked. Trump is referring to easy dick.

We may never know what Trump's perplexing shorthand stands for, but we sought to solve this mystery of American national security ourselves, in the most democratic way possible: by talking to the people directly. Thus, Broadly took to the streets of Williamsburg to ask Brooklynites on their lunch breaks what the phrase could possibly mean.

Right outside the VICE office, I physically ran into a gaggle of British tourists and posed the question to them. "You're the scholar, John," one of them said, referring me to the tallest of the lot. "Easy dick," John replied, and then started to walk away at a brisk pace. Left with his friends, I asked them if they would agree with that conclusion. "Sure," said one named Kit. "Easy D, easy dick. Simple."

The next person who agreed to speak with me, and didn't furiously avoid eye contact, was a woman named Gabrielle, who is originally from France but now lives in Williamsburg. After reading the tweet, she suggested that it might have something to do with failing school. "D, that's a grade you can get here [in America], right?" she asked. After I confirmed that getting a D is possible, but usually rare, she decided this interpretation was correct: "[Trump] thinks America is failing."

Next, I approached two men, Jeff and Oscar, who were taking a smoke break outside of the Williamsburg WeWork office. It took them a while to get through the tweet, but they ultimately agreed that "EASY D" is short for "easy doomsday."

Leaving Jeff and Oscar with a sense of imminent doom, I entered the Chipotle next door. There, the man making my burrito informed me that he couldn't comment, but he gave me a big scoop of steak. By the soda machines, I came across three Italian tourists. Two of them were stumped, explaining to me that they're not well-versed in American politics. The third turned to me and wryly said, "Easy dick." Dick tally: three.

As I exited Chipotle, I spotted a man wearing the same shearling-collared denim jacket as me. I learned that his name is John, and he thinks that "Donald Trump should be deported." As for what "EASY D" could possibly mean, he seemed to have a hunch: "Easy decision? Maybe it has to do with the court decision over his executive order [on immigration]," he said.

Possibly. I made my way to the Bedford subway stop. There, I paused to speak to Reggie, the man who sells Kylie Lip Kits on the street at discount prices. "It must mean disaster or danger," he said solemnly. "Something bad is going to happen." Hannah, a mom passing by with a newborn baby swaddled to the front of her body yelled back at me, "Easy dick." Dick tally: four.

Across from the subway stop, I spotted a Norwegian couple in athletic gear sitting in the sun with smoothies. "We're not from around here," one explained after they had read the tweet. "That doesn't sound good," the other said. "We are sorry about what's happening here."