Scorpio, September 2016

Your sign is the sign of death and rebirth, and you're ruled by the Water element, which symbolizes emotions and intuition. These qualities will help you navigate September's turbulence: Mercury retrograde in Virgo, two eclipses, and Saturn having a tense run-in with Neptune.

The first of the two eclipses this month arrives on the 1st—in Earth sign Virgo—and it will activate the sector of your chart that rules your friendships. It's funny that Virgo, a sign famous for being picky and solitary, occupies the friendship sector of your chart. It is true that you would rather be alone than be around people who don't live up to your standards!

Your standards in friendships will definitely be something worth reflecting on during this eclipse; it's very likely you'll say goodbye to some friends—eclipses love to tear things and people away from us—but also meet some people who you'll feel destined to have met. (Eclipses also always have a fated vibe about them!) This solar eclipse in Virgo will lead you to see your circle of friends in a new light. It will also reveal things to you about the people you associate with at work or in your community. Acquaintances you meet at this time could bring you very surprising news or connections!

Watch out for financial stress during this eclipse—the Sun in prudent Virgo will be challenging Saturn in Sagittarius, a sign that doesn't think twice about picking up the tab. How much are your friendships costing you, Scorpio—both financially and emotionally?

On September 7, the Sun in Virgo will trine (one of the easiest astrological aspects) power planet Pluto in Capricorn, which will be fantastic for communication and for connecting with VIPs or people who could get to the "next level" (you're such a social climber, Scorpio). An inspiring or affirming conversation is likely to go down as well!

The official planet of good vibes, Jupiter, enters lovely Libra on September 9. Jupiter in Libra will activate the sector of your chart that rules rest, solitude, and time alone, so get ready to be your own BFF over the next year.

I hope this doesn't sound like a bummer to you, Scorpio. I know you always open up your horoscope hoping to read about whom you will fuck or who will give you money. But this next year is major for you in terms of catching up on you—to develop your intuition, reconnect with yourself, and best of all, catch up on some sleep. Libra is the sign of balance, and generous Jupiter wants you to find yours by going within. This is a fantastic time for "letting go," something we woo-woo New Agers are always raving about.

September 10 brings the Saturn/Neptune square, a very testing time for you. Saturn and Neptune have already faced off a few times in the last year. Think back to November 2015 and June 2016—the themes around cash, creativity, and your love life that were big then will likely come back again now for you to work with.

Saturn rules boundaries and rules, while Neptune dissolves everything it touches. Saturn is strict and orderly, while Neptune's fog is filled with fairies, doors to other realms, and delusions—some of which are harmless, some of which are decidedly not. As you might be able to guess, shit gets rough when these two planets are not getting along. We don't know where we end and where others begin. We feel paranoid, anxious, and lost. Things don't make sense, and people act from a place of fear. Be very gentle with yourself at this time—tap into your spiritual side, spend time with people you love, and write your worries in a journal instead of keeping them active in your head.

As if that isn't enough for one month, we have our second eclipse of September on the 16: a lunar eclipse in fellow Water sign Pisces. This eclipse will blast open the sector of your chart that rules your love life and your art—basically everything that makes your heart sing and fills you with inspiration. Have you been totally uninspired, Scorpio? This eclipse will lead you to some fantastic places. Have you been obsessing over projects or people who suck? This eclipse will expose the truth about them.

Emotional confrontations are likely, but they won't be heated—that's not how Pisces, the sign this eclipse is in, likes to do things. These confrontations will be tearful, sprinkled with plenty of white lies and half-truths. Someone may tell you they're heading to the bathroom in a middle of this tearful exchange, but they'll actually leave the bar—that's how Pisces energy works (even if the person you're speaking to isn't a Pisces, Scorpio, this is the vibe that will be in the air).

Accountability, responsibility, and finding healthy ways to relate are big themes of both eclipses this month. Are you ready to let go of the people and situations that aren't working for you in order to let some new ones in? Also, please remember: An eclipse may take something (or someone) away from you; however, something new will come to replace it. Don't despair.

On September 22, the Sun enters Air sign Libra, marking the beginning of autumn. On the same date, Mercury ends retrograde in Virgo—finally the miscommunications, delays, and technical difficulties will let up! By the way, Mercury retrogrades are not an ideal time to sign contracts, make agreements, or basically do anything important; however, they are fantastic times to work on old projects and reconnect with old friends (I expect you'll run into a lot of past acquaintances this month!).

On September 23, seductive Venus enters your sign, Scorpio! You'll feel especially sexy during this time. People will find you even more charming and mysterious than usual. The planet of passion (and war), Mars, also changes sigs on September 27, entering Capricorn and igniting the communication sector of your chart. Plenty of opportunities to flirt will come your way during this time. This is also a fantastic time to get reacquainted with you neighborhood—cuties are sure to be hanging out in cafes and bars. Over the last month or so, while Venus was in Libra, you weren't going out as much. Watch out for exciting news (or gossip) when power planet Pluto ends its retrograde on September 26.

As social as you will find yourself at the end of the month, Scorpio, there are two days that I want you to stay in—or at least make extra time for yourself: September 26, when the Sun meets Jupiter in Libra, and September 30, during the new moon in Libra. Find balance by resting and recharging alone. This is a fantastic time to give yourself a tarot reading or learn more about your birth chart, or to just do some journaling. Or play ten hours of videos games. Get out of your head and go to a faraway land! See you in October, Scorpio!