via Deviant Art user HauntingVisionsStock
We've all been there: everyone's crowded into the sanctuary, but the ritual hasn't quiiite started yet (Karen forgot her sex herbs) (again). You're milling around with your old companions but here are a few new additions to the coven, and since you can't do the blood pact until next eclipse no one is really meshing, socially. How to break the ice? Instead of complimenting their talons or exchanging tired smudging tips, why not try one of these fun jokes to lighten the mood? You know what they say about daughters of the devil: we love to laugh.Why did the witch cross the road?
To get to the Other Side.Two men walk into a bar. Both are blood offerings to Manon.Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Satan.
Satan who? Just kidding, my Lord.What's black and white and red all over?
A diverse coven writhing in ecstasy during the height of a ritualistic menstrual dance.What did the witch say to the waiter?
Don't burn me… on that steak! The revenge of my sisters will be swift and unyielding, lasting centuries and sparing none. Your children will weep for the sins you have inflicted on women whose powers you could not understand, and so feared. Did you see what I did there, burn me… stake?A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are on a sinking boat. The brunette says, "We've got to get in the life rafts!" The redhead says, "We should send out a distress signal!" The blonde says nothing, she has transformed into a raven and flown to safety.What's the difference between a witch and your kooky, arty aunt?
Nothing, your Aunt Tina is a witch for sure.What did the witch say after another witch covered her in oil?
Now I'm really getting anointed.*A long series of slow blinks* (This one only works if you have a cat as your familiar.)What did one witch say to another?
The language of the sisterhood is ancient and vast. Probably a spell or something, though.How many witches does it take to screw in a light bulb?
The coven operates by moonlight, Miranda, go home.
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To get to the Other Side.Two men walk into a bar. Both are blood offerings to Manon.Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Satan.
Satan who? Just kidding, my Lord.What's black and white and red all over?
A diverse coven writhing in ecstasy during the height of a ritualistic menstrual dance.What did the witch say to the waiter?
Don't burn me… on that steak! The revenge of my sisters will be swift and unyielding, lasting centuries and sparing none. Your children will weep for the sins you have inflicted on women whose powers you could not understand, and so feared. Did you see what I did there, burn me… stake?A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are on a sinking boat. The brunette says, "We've got to get in the life rafts!" The redhead says, "We should send out a distress signal!" The blonde says nothing, she has transformed into a raven and flown to safety.What's the difference between a witch and your kooky, arty aunt?
Nothing, your Aunt Tina is a witch for sure.What did the witch say after another witch covered her in oil?
Now I'm really getting anointed.*A long series of slow blinks* (This one only works if you have a cat as your familiar.)What did one witch say to another?
The language of the sisterhood is ancient and vast. Probably a spell or something, though.How many witches does it take to screw in a light bulb?
The coven operates by moonlight, Miranda, go home.